Looking Through a Different Lens

There are three perceptions in an interaction: our own perception, the perception of others and our perception of their perception. It’s rare when these fully match. Tension can arise when our impressions of events are conflicting. We instill more compassion when we allow ourselves to see something from another’s point of view.

When we have known someone for most of our life, we know the experiences that have shaped who they are. It’s like we allow more leniency for indiscretions because we know why they act the way they do. This is why the family bond can be so strong, because they deeply understand each other. It’s much more difficult for us to give that same leeway to others when we don’t know their history.

Every person sees the world through their own life experience, like using a unique pair of glasses. We get so used to our own way of seeing things, we forget that there are others with drastically different vision. Just as we would like others to see it our way, we can benefit from seeing through their lens. Doing this affords us the opportunity to expand our understanding. If we attempt to see a situation from another’s vantage, we honor life and all the ways it can be experienced.

Action:
Look back to a recent situation where you have had a disagreement with someone. You can first look into your own reasoning why you feel the way you do. Did something happen in your past that colors your view on this? Then think about how well you know this other person. Do you know anything about their past that may have shaped their thinking on this issue? Knowing the origin of thoughts and feelings is a key in understanding both yourself and another. If the disagreement is with a total stranger, your comfort can increase by allowing yourself to acknowledge that this individual’s history has shaped their thinking, just like you. There may be disagreement, but we can accept that human experience appears in many different forms beyond our own.

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